See you in my dreams

 
It's hard to explain to people who basically know nothing about you or you life. But last month, in August, something terrible happened.
...My baby, my best friend Stella got run ower by a car (a car that didn't stop after it hit her). For more than 10 years she's always been there for me through the though times of my life. She saved me from myself and stood by my side, always. She was and still is my pet soulmate.


I'm not gonna go into detail with all this though, there's no reason.  I'm just gonna say..... it's all been so, so devastating.
What can you do when you lose your best friend..?

It still feels like a dream and I'm not okay... but I'm okay.... - those of you who know what grief is like, probably know what I'm talking about.
- but it's much better now. I am learning to focus the joyful memories, rather than the fact that she's not here. You never wan't to say goodbye to someone precious to you, but I'm at a point in my life now, where I am ready to part ways with her more than I would have been just about a year ago (or earlier).
 
This drawing just came to me a few weeks ago. Stella and I ALWAYS slept close. And even though there are a lot of mistakes and things I would've wanted to do differently in this drawing, (I mean JESUS, that yellow sign...guh! and I don't even look like me) I'm pretty satisfied and glad that I did it. I don't have that many pictures of us sleeping. It's an (almost) exact replika of my bed and a part of my 'wall of lame' as it's called.
Mom cried when she saw the sketch, even though she hardly knew Stella (we live far apart)

I've had massive support form all my friends too.
Also, thank you UrbanPanser. I know I haven't been answering, but you should know that the little heart you put on my profile meant the world to me ♥ Thank you so much.




My life has changed.
Literally. A lot of good things happened after this too though... you'll probably hear more about all that later on... but one thing I can say officially is; I'm moving into my own, new house soon (next monday the 15th actually). All alone - but it's close to EVERYTHING and one of my best friends. It's gonna be great.

scruffyfluffy.deviantart.com/a…

Stars shine a little brighter now
Sleep well, Stella